Sunday, May 18, 2008



Pender and Jenkins share a laugh with instructor pilot following their dance with death

Thursday, May 15, 2008

APPLES SLEEP WELL

Avoid Third Lose In A Row
Nice Not to Lose

Provda
Nashville TN

Following two consecutive weeks which saw them end up on the losing side of the final score, the Apples were once again able to sleep well last night after avoiding what would have been a club record 3 straight losing weeks.

To continue a common theme of the year, it was determined at the teams breakfast yesterday that the Apples would be missing 2 key starters going into the night and they would be again forced to flip flop the lineup to cover the holes left by the absences of slugger Greg Treep and gold glove winner Tiffany Smith.

" No question it's been difficult to get our mojo going this season with all the hick ups we've had in the lineup this year" said AGFHOF Don Bernitt. "I guess the only good thing that you can say is that the Apples have established quite a reputation and following in the area and that sometimes makes it easier to fill the open seats on the bench" concluded Bernitt.

"It's nice to get this losing monkey off our backs" celebrated 2008 Rookie Of The Year candidate Scott Quinlin as he didn't join the rest of the Apples for a late night dinner at a local Nashville steak house. "I'll toast to that" chimed Catcher Brooke Byram as she and Captain My Captain Tony Byram enjoyed their first non losing Wednesday night in 3 weeks. "No doubt, losing stinks and the past few weeks have not been fun" panned Outfielder Patty Pender as she enjoyed a few iced teas with teammates as the evening ended and brought the mid week ritual of Apples Coed Softball to a close.

And so it was, the Apples get off of the losing train and will now standby to hear from League Commissioner Sammy Metz when and where they will make up last nights rained out game and when we will next hear that now famous cheer.................

How bout them Apples!

Thursday, May 8, 2008

APPLES CAN'T HANG

Wrong Kind Of Streak
Lose Second In A Row

Damnit.com
Nashville, TN

The question to be answered at the Granny White Complex last night was simple, did the Apples lose or were they beat?

It is this observers opinion that the answer is crystal clear, the Apples lost a game that they would have, should have and could have won.

In what has become an all too familiar script this year, the Apples again took to the field missing 2 key starters and were forced to play with a make shift lineup that simply didn't get the job done.

"We just don't have the depth on the bench to compete week after week in this league without our starters" said AGFHOF Don Bernitt following the game. Bernitt was referring to the abscence of third baseman Scott Quinlin who earlier in the day was sending good luck text messages from the beaches of San Diego and the void left in the lineup when last weeks player of the game Greg Treep was forced to miss the game due to back spasms.

The night got off to a bad start for the Apples when they gave up 10 runs in the first inning and quickly found themselves in a hole too deep to climb out of. After the disastrous first inning, the Apples played even the rest of the way and the game ended with the final score showing 15-5

"We laid an egg tonight" said Apple Captain My Captain Tony Byram following the game. "We're better than that and we need to step it up over the next few weeks as we make a push to the playoffs"

Following the game, Apple pitcher Greg Swafford was named the offensive player of the game. Swafford put on perhaps his best hitting performance of the year as he banged 2 balls off the fence and ended the night with 3 doubles. Defensively, it was the glove of Patty Pender that was awarded the defensive player award. A small point to be added, the glove was actually on the hand of John Jones who had his glove stolen from his locker before the game and was forced to borrow the glove of Pender. Jones put on one heck of a show as he sprinted down ball after ball and made several tough plays look easy.

The Apples now find themselves in the middle of the pack in the standings with a record of 3 - 3 and their hopes of a regular season crown have all but faded. "Not too worry" said Bernitt, "get us a wildcard into the playoffs and then stand back and watch us go."

Talk is cheap and so here we go, will it be more would have, could have, should have or will it be that famous cheer.............................................

How bout them Apples!

Thursday, May 1, 2008

APPLES ROLLED

Nightgame or Nightmare?
Apples Never In It

Ohwell
ParisPostIntelligencer

Following most Apple games the talk of the evening traditionally will lead to discussion and comment of the normally explosive bats of the Apple offensive. Last night however this was not the case and instead the post game spotlight was pointed on the Apples defense.

In a game that found the Apples opponents wearing the hitting shoes for the night, the Apple outfield was on the run all night as they chased long ball after long ball into the gaps and towards the fence. For left fielder Greg Treep, who is now in is sophomore season with the Apples, the end of the game could not come soon enough. Treep was kept busy all night when inning after inning multiple hard hit balls were rocketed his way. To his credit, Treep made several circus catches in left and showed early and often what is meant in Appleville as a ball that is "DW" The expression which was coined by Apple Captain My Captain Tony Byram, is often heard in Apple practices to describe a hit ball that would "dive worthy" in an attempt to catch.

Apart from the workout given the Apples outfield last night, highlights of the game were few and far between. If a bright spot were to be needed, it would be noted that along with his defensive play, Treep homered deep to left to the join the evening home run club that got started when Shane Alexander crushed his league leading 19th home run into the dark night skies in right.

Also of note, in an emotional post game gathering, Apple Tiffany Smith was awarded the game ball and team courage award. Smith, who spent 2 hours yesterday under anaesthesia and on the operating table, inspired all in attendance when she slowly trotted onto the field for the start of the 9:00 game.

When asked about her commitment to the Apples and her determination to play following her induced nap, Smith quizzically looked at reporters and said "When did you get here?"

At the end of the evening about the best thing that could be said was that it was the end of the evening.

Final Score: Bad Guys 19 - Apples 3

Thursday, April 24, 2008

They're Back !

Apples Win
Run Record To 3-1

Marketwatch
Nashville,TN

After suffering the worse loss in team history last week, and their first regular season loss in almost two years, the Apples took to the field last night with a mission to regroup and move forward as they enter the heart of the 2008 season.

It what has become their trademark, the Apples put on an offensive display that could not be slowed and in doing so fought their way back into the win column by pounding the Affionion Anglers by a final score of 16 - 3

The Apples were paced by league MVP Shane Alexander who crushed his 12th and 13th home runs of the year while driving in 6 runs on the night. Apples John Jones, Sarah Milam, Patty Pender, Greg Treep, Tiffany Smith and Scott Quinlin also recorded multiple hits and in doing so helped bring the swagger back to the Apples.

Following a season beginning 3 game suspension for an undisclosed violation of team rules, veteran Apple first baseman Christi Copous made her season debut last night and left doubt has to her feelings about her suspension. Now playing with a chip on her shoulder, Copous went 3 for 3 at the plate and twice hit the fence on balls that nearly left the park.When asked after the game about how she felt about the early season 3 game suspension and her play of the night, Copous responded with a sharp "Bite Me"

On the mound, Apple starting pitcher Greg Swafford was in his groove as he struck out 3 on the night and controlled the pace of the game from start to finish. Swafford's battery mate, catcher Brooke Byram provided the games most exciting play when as a base runner she rounded third and with the play at the plate lowered her shoulder and barrel rolled the visiting team catcher and sent the ball flying to the backstop as she crossed the plate. Byram's action nearly set off a bench clearing brawl and quickly led to a warning to both teams to calm down or risk being ejected for a league minimum 2 games.

And then there was AGFHOF Don Bernitt. In a move missed by almost all including most of his teammates, Bernitt once again proved his value and overall greatness when he and he alone noticed an illegal lineup being played by the opposing team which led to a delay in the game while umpires and league officials flipped pages in the rule book to determine the correct call. Following the delay, umpires ruled in favor of the Apples and it was game on as the Apple romp continued.

And so it was, the Apples bounced back from bitter smack down of a week ago and once again the crowd was alive with that famous cheer...............

How bout them Apples!

Sunday, April 20, 2008

APPLES GO SKYDIVING

Geronimo
Apples Take a Leap

RUNUTS
Nashville, TN

Following last week's crushing defeat on the diamond, the Apples sought to regroup this weekend and at the same time turned another page in the Thrills of Victory book of life.

In one of their more spectacular off the field endeavours of the past few years, the Apples where seen this past weekend Skydiving from 14,000 feet over Middle TN.

In a jump that saw them "free fall" for 60 seconds at speeds up to 130 miles per hours to 5,000 ft above ground, the Apples were as can be imagined exhilarated after the then 5 minute parachute descent back to the ground.

The action got started when Apple Patty Pender and her tandem jump partner did a back flip out of the King Air Jump Plane to get the jump off in style. Pender was joined by AGFHOF Don Bernitt who left the plane last and soon was free falling like a pro.

"That was awesome!" said Pender as she slapped high fives with her parents Jo and Bob Pender who joined former Apple Coach Dennis Miller on the tarmac to witness the jump. Pender then added "I've been on some pretty cool roller coaster rides at amusement parks before and about all I can say now is that roller coasters are for wusses"

Following Penders landing all eyes turned to sky as Bernitt was seen making his final approach below the red, white and blue canopy of his parachute. At about 500 feet Bernitt could be heard yelling to the ground crew "get the Apple champagne ready" Bernitt then made a near perfect landing which soon had several instructors at the jump school questioning whether this was truly his first ever jump.

"Un frickin believable!" said Bernitt when he landed, "I'm ready to do it again" he added as his tandem partner unclipped their harness and began the process of gathering the parachute that lay fluttering in the wind behind them.

With the spectacular events of the day behind them, the question must now be asked; what next? Only time will tell but with these Apples there is one thing that can be said for sure............

How Bout Them Apples!


Fans gathered early to watch the Apples jump


The Apples prepare for the day's events


Bernitt suits up as he readies for the ride of his life



Suited up and ready to go



Bernitt and Pender recorded their last wills before jumping.


Final walk through before boarding King Air


The Apples pause for group picture before loading


You ready for this? Pender at open door and ready to jump at 14,000 ft


Pender got the day going with a back flip out the door




Back Flip at 14,000 feet


Pender flashes her "pulp fiction" wave while falling at 130 mph




Pender and Bernitt enjoy the ride



Pender was lovin every minute of it as she begins her descent



Pender swoops in for final approach


Following her landing, Pender proclaimed that roller coasters are for wusses


Under the Red,White and Blue canopy, Bernitt hangs out at 1,000 ft



Bernitt nailed a near perfect landing



At the end of the day the Apples were all smiles

Thursday, April 17, 2008

APPLES GET WAXED

Apples Humbled
Not Even Close

MontanaTimes
Nashville, TN

It was the same song but a different verse last night for the Apples. Last week the Apples came out firing on all cylinders in route to a blowout 23-0 win. Last night, the shoe was on the other foot as it was the Apples who were pummeled in a game that was never close.

The beat down was over as soon as it began when the Apples gave up 7 first inning runs and then never looked back as they fumbled and bumbled their way to the pasting that ended with a final score of 28-1

In a game that was littered by errors including 3 by AGFHOF Don Bernitt in centerfield, the Apples were simply out of their league as they faced off with a team that included several clowns from a traveling circus that was working it's way through Middle, TN.

When asked to find a bright spot in last night's game, Bernitt quickly and decisively said "umm, umm, umm, next question"

In a nutshell, the Apples have been brought back down to earth and must now regroup and decided where they go as a team from here. Do they put this crushing defeat behind them and live to play another day or do they turn on themselves and become a shadow of the once great team we have come to know.

Now we must wait and see if we will ever again hear that now famous cheer...........

Friday, April 11, 2008

An Apple Is Headed To Germany

Future Apple Off to Germany
Michael Oliver Heads Overseas

USAUSA
Nashville, TN

In breaking news out of the United States Air Force Acadamey, it has been announced that future Apple Michael Oliver, a freshman at the USAFA, has been given his summer duty assignment and will soon be on his way for a tour of duty at the Ramstein Airbase in Germany. Oliver, nephew of Don Bernitt, was notified earlier today and as expected is one excited Cadet. " Germany is where my mom and dad met so this assignment will be special to me" said Oliver as he rifled through the Google world map to determine the exact location of his 2008 summer home.

When he arrives at Ramstein, Oliver will soon see why the airbase which is seven miles west of Kaiserslautern, is in fact the largest NATO airbase in the world. In addition to the storied history of the base which was also visited by his Aunt Patty when she served as a helicopter pilot in the U.S. Army, Oliver will pay witness to one of the finest 18 hole golf courses in Europe and some of the best beer in all the world. (At 18 years of age,and a Cadet of the finest honour, Oliver will not partake in actual consumption)

It is with pride and confidence in America's next best generation that the Apples congratulate Cadet 4th Class Michael Oliver

GO MICHAEL GO !!

Thursday, April 10, 2008

All Apples

Apples In A Rout
Team Records Fall

Beijing Times
Nashville,TN

If there were any lingering doubts as to the ability of the Apples to play in the elite upper tier of Coed Softball in Nashville, those questions were put to rest once for all last night.

In a display of their true team strength, the Apples again played without several starters and for the second week in a row threw out a patch work lineup that by games end set several club records for both offensive and defensive performance.

Offensively the Apples simply could not be stopped as they put on a hitting display the likes of which will may not be seen again for some time. The Apples batted around the lineup 3 times and when the massacre was over each Apple in the lineup ended the night with at least 2 hits. The hit parade was led by second baseman Tiffany Smith who finished the night a perfect 4 for 4. Also of note, Greg Treep broke out of his one game slump by picking up 3 hits including a towering grand slam home run into the pine trees in left that sealed the games fate in the 3rd inning. Not to be out down, shortstop Shane Alexander crushed his second home run of the season when the ball appeared to be "jazzed" as it flew over the left field fence.

Defensively for the Apples, it was a one in a million night. Led by newly acquired out fielder Sarah Brock in left, Sarah Milam in right, Brooke Byram behind the plate and Patty Pender at first, the Apples turned in the ultra rare performance of shutting out their opponent. When asked about the rare shutout, AGFHOF Don Bernitt said "it ultimately comes down to great pitching." In addition to Bernitt's masterful performance on the hill, the Apples turned two double plays on the night including a scorekeepers nightmare 1-3-1-6 play that ended the game and closed the books with the final score lighting the scoreboard at 23 - 0 Apples.

Following the game team Captain Tony Byram presented the game balls to Brock and Treep before taking a moment to recognize the efforts of center fielder John Jones who is quickly finding his stride following last years season ending injury in week 4 of the season. " It's good to have John healthy again" said Byram as the Apples celebrated their 2nd win of the season.

Off the field, the Apples paid tribute to long time Team Apparel Buyer Tim Kaylor who was in attendance for the final time of the season. Kaylor joined the Apples for a pregame meal and coke as he prepared to say his goodbyes to the Apples. Kaylor has accepted a position with the Cactus Coed Softball League and will be moving to Phoenix later this week. " Although we will miss Tim around here, we wish him all the best" said former Apple Head Coach Dennis Miller who was also in the crowd for last nights game.

That's now two up and two down for the undefeated Apples and although the names and the game stars may change from week to week, one thing that will never change is that now famous cheer.................. How bout them Apples!

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Touch em All......

Oliver Goes Yard
First Career Homerun

Lookouthank
Middletown, DE


Matty Oliver, brother of former Heisman Trophy candidate Michael Oliver, and 2007 Delaware Pitcher of the Year Jeff Oliver, took his turn in the spotlight this weekend when he hit his first career home run while playing for the internationally known Delaware Diamonds travel team.

With the count at 1 ball an no strikes in the 4th inning, young Matty crushed the 2 run homer to the deepest part of the park in straight away center to lead the Diamonds to an 8-3 victory. To go along with the tape measure HR, Oliver also smacked a single and a double to cap a 3 for 3 day at the plate. Oliver then turned in a flawless performance as catcher and was awarded the game ball following the game.

When asked about the home run Oliver said " I definitely Jacked it." Oliver added that he had been "pumping iron all winter and it's starting to pay off" he continued by saying " my guns have been smokin lately and not only am I hitting better but the chicks dig it."

With the home run, Oliver now finds himself only 388 behind his Uncle Don who is still knocking them out of the park weekly as a member of the Nashville based Apples. When asked about the the chase for the family record Oliver said that he doesn't get caught up in all that, " my Grandpa taught me a long time ago to try and hit the ball as hard as I can, not as far as I can. If they go out they go out." "And on top of that, I don't think I believe half the stuff that my Uncle says about his games anyway."

So here we go, North, South, East and West it's time again to PLAY BALL!
The right handed hitting Matty Oliver gets ready to GO YARD

Oliver was awarded the Game Ball following his first career home run

Thursday, April 3, 2008

APPLES WIN! APPLES WIN!

Apples Notch a W
Win Season Opener

Wearegoodpost
Nashville,TN

Mother Nature took a day off from her duties of rainmaker for a day and in turn provided a clear dry evening last night for the 2008 season opener of the Apples.

Playing in front of raucous sold out crowd, the Apples welcomed the new season by pulling off what may turn out to be a landmark win in club history.

The significance of the victory was due to who the Apples played. In what for the most part went unreported following last seasons undefeated run through the regular season, the Apples were " moved up " a league and this year are playing in the most elite coed softball league in Nashville.

In addition to the higher level of competition of the league that includes several travel and semi-pro teams, the Apples were also faced with the challenge of playing without 4 starters from last year's team.

Gone from last years team is veteran second baseman Robin Meadows who signed a lucrative free agent contract during the off season that will have her taking her game to an expansion team playing on Sunday afternoons. Also missing from last nights lineup were All Stars Christi Copous and Patty Pender. Copous was in New York City to film commercials for the Apples upcoming marketing campaign entitled "Bite Me" and was forced to miss the game when her return flight to Nashville was delayed by a crazy lady on the plane (not Copous). Pender, who spends her off season coaching tennis also missed the game when she became stuck in traffic and was unable to get to the park from the tennis court. Pender's absence did not go unnoticed as fans spent several innings chanting " Where is Patty, where is Patty"

On the field last evening, it was the ladies that led the way. Substitute first baseman Melanie Sakarapanee, outfielder Sarah Milan, second baseman Tiffany Smith and catcher Brooke Byram all brought their hitting shoes and came through with clutch hit after clutch hit to lead the Apples to the 8-7 victory. To go along with the performance of the gals, newly acquired third baseman Scott Quinlan went from goat to hero when he bounced back from taking a called strike 3 in the 4th inning to then driving in the tying and winning runs with a triple off the right field fence in the last inning. Along with Quinlans key hit, shortstop Shane Alexander picked up where he left off last year when he crushed a mammoth home run over the light towers in right.

At his postgame news conference AGFHOF Don Bernitt was asked about the new look Apples and the play of the new team members to which he responded, " the Apples don't rebuild, we reload"

So that's one down and 9 to go. With the win the Apples extended their regular season win streak to 11 games and counting. How far the streak will go is to be seen, but one thing to be said for sure is..............................

How bout them Apples!!

In other Nashville sports yesterday, former Apple equipment manager Savannah Jenkins was spectacular as she led the St. Edwards Saints girls volleyball team to a 25-16,25-12 victory over the visiting St. Bernard Spikers.

Jenkins starred throughout the two game set with set after set and spike after spike. To go along with her floor play, Jenkins knocked down 5 aces on her serves and quickly has established herself as a "player" in girls volleyball in Nashville

Way to go Elmo!

Savannah Jenkins rocked the house as she led the Saints to a big volleyball win

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Apples Name Team Captain

Opening Day Set For Weds.
Rain Rain Go Away

LastYear
Nashville, TN

On the eve of the 2008 Coed Softball Season Opener, the Apples today have announced the selection of Tony Byram to be team captain for the 2008 season.

Byram enters his 3rd year of play for the Apples in 2008 and will now be faced with the daunting task of keeping the sometimes volatile Apples focused on the tasks at hand leading up to the start of the season.

When reached for comment following an early morning fishing trip, Byram simply said, "I'm touched" Of course Byram will not get any argument's from his teammates on his comment.

It can not be confirmed that one of the main reasons leading to Byram's appointment was his recent purchase of red softball shoes. When asked to comment on the shoes AGFHOF Don Bernitt said " yea the shoes are cool and I might get a pair but don't forget, Apples are BLUE."

In a related note, the Apples will debut new team uniforms tomorrow night for what is now being called the "Last Year of the Apples" With this in mind the speculation is that we can expect "throw back" or "old school" uniforms when the 2008 season begins.

Only time will tell and for now about all that can said for sure is


How bout them Apples!

2008 Team Captain Tony Byram will be sporting his new red shoes this season

Friday, March 28, 2008

2008 Schedule Released

Apples Ready For Campaign
Season Begins on CSBC

OHNO
Nashville TN

In a hastily arranged news conference, Granny White Coed Softball League Commissioner Sam Metz interrupted his annual spring vacation in Southern California yesterday to release the highly anticipated 2008 Apples schedule.

The Apples will open the season next Weds. April 2nd at 6:00 p.m. This will mark the 3rd consecutive season that the Apples will play in the leagues first game of the season which will again this year be shown on the Coed Softball Channel.

When asked what his plans are for the remainder of his spring fling, Metz gleefully proclaimed, " I'm going to Disneyland"

2008 Apples Schedule:

4/2----------6:00
4/9----------8:00
4/16---------7:00
4/23---------6:00
4/30---------9:00
5/7----------6:00
5/14---------9:00
5/21---------8:00
5/28---------6:00
6/4----------9:00

Monday, March 17, 2008

APPLES SAFE

Near Miss In Atlanta Tornado
GMC 1 Saves the Apples

Noplacelikehome.com
Nashville

The original plan was for a leisurely drive through Georgia to their off season compound on Hilton Head Island. Instead, the Apples were faced with a harrowing adventure this past Friday's evening as they drove through an F2 tornado in downtown Atlanta.

Traveling in the team bus ( AKA GMC 1 ) the Apples narrowly averted disaster as they unexpectedly found themselves driving through Atlanta just as the freak tornado ripped havoc across the city. " It was one heck of a ride " said AGFOHF Don Bernitt as he describe the events that took place. " No doubt we knew we were driving into a storm as we made are way towards the city " added Bernitt. " I've seen a lot of wild storms and this one was different" "Picture this" continued Bernitt, "it's 10:00 at night and the skies are aglow with flashes of lighting. The odd thing was that with each flash of light you could see the sky and it was yellow versus the normal white or blue light that accompanies most lighting storms."

Little did the Apples know that they in fact were driving into the middle of a tornado that was ripping Atlanta to shreds. "It got rocky and wild " said Patty Pender as she calmed her nerves following the drive. Pender was at he wheel of GMC1 and was forced to navigate through toppled interstate signs, cars slammed against medians and other arrays of twisted metal and debris that littered I85 in the heart of Atlanta.

" I don't know what it is about Atlanta " said Bernitt as he recalled that he had also been in Olympic Park back in 1996 on the day the park was bombed during the summer Olympics. " I think the next time we want to head to Hilton Head we will take the company plane Apple 1"

Following the harrowing drive through Atlanta the Apples continued their drive as planned and within a few hours were safe and sound at their Hilton Head Estate. As is often the case following these types of storms, the Apples awoke to beautiful clear blue skies along the coast of South Carolina and began what is to be their final few days of vacation before the beginning of the 2008 Coed Softball season.

In other team news, it has been announced that the U.S. 5th Court of Appeals has ruled in favor the Apples and a previous attempt by Granny White to ban the Apples from the league has been denied. The case, which has been under a gag order since the end of last season was finally ruled on and court records will soon become public. The thrust of the case involved an attempt to deny the powerhouse Apples a right to play in the Granny White League based on the immigration status and legal residencies of several players. It is being reported that officials from the Dept. of Homeland Security and the INS testified on behalf of the Apples and that all former and current Apples have passed the requirements as mandated through eVerify.

The news of the Apple victory was announced by first baseman Christi Copous as she left the leagues winter meetings in Franklin, TN. Copous told reporters from Court TV that "it's official, the Apples will be playing again on Wednesday nights this year beginning in about three weeks"

So here we go, with Spring upon us it's that time again and it is now just a matter of time before we hear that famous cheer............... How bout them Apples.
Following a drive through the Atlanta tornado the Apples made it to the sunny beaches of Hilton Head Island

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Falcons Like Apples

USAFA Season Underway
Game One In The Books

softballisforgirls.com
Colorado Springs,CO

It may still be February but to the Cadets at the United States Air Force Academy it's SOFTBALL TIME IN COLORADO!

Playing under sunny skies and temperatures in the high 40's, the Falcons kicked off their 2008 intramural season yesterday and by games end left no doubt that we are in for one heck of a competitive season this year.

As would be expected, to a player the Falcons seemed to be in great condition and playing at mid season form already.

The Flyers were lead by Cadet Second Class Tyler Perry who pitched one of the best games in the history of the Academy. Perry struck out 10 in route to throwing the first no hitter of his storied career as a Falcon.

Along with Perry, Cadet Fourth Class Michael Oliver came ready to play yesterday and chipped in 2 RBI's to go along with a run scored. Oliver also received the games Talon Award following several spectacular plays at first base. When asked to comment about his first Coed game Oliver said " it's definitely slow pitch but it was pretty fun."

Following yesterday's game it was announced that the winner of the Spring League at the Academy will be offered a shot at taking on America's team the Apples. "It's the least we can do to help the cause " said AGFHOF Don Bernitt as he extended the offer via satellite phone to the Academy. " We look forward to kicking their butts " added Bernitt.

Rest easy America, your sons and daughters may be enduring the challenge that is life at the United States Air Force Academy, but we can take comfort in knowing that when it's all said and done they will not forget to HIT THAT BALL!

How bout them Falcons!

Friday, February 22, 2008

It's Condie!

Apples Give Presidential Endorsement
Condoleezza Rice Gets Apples Support

Simpleasthat.com
Nashville,TN

As the 2008 Presidential Primary now rounds third and heads for home, the long awaited endorsement by the Apples has been announced.

Speaking from his secluded off season home, AGFHOF Don Bernitt confirmed earlier wire reports that the Apples have decided to endorse Condoleezza Rice. " That's right, she's our pick and we look forward to attending her Inaugural Ball when she becomes President of the United States"

When asked to clarify the reasoning behind selecting Rice who is not a candidate this year Bernitt said " Well she should be, she has what it takes to bring our country together." Bernitt continued laying out the values of Rice that led to the Apple endorsement by adding "For those who are looking for a candidate who has shown the commitment to protect and defend the Constitution of the United States she as our Secretary of State has the experience to do just that." Bernitt then added, "for the academics amongst us, Rice earned a Masters Degree from Notre Dame and then her Ph.D from the University of Denver before serving as Provost of Stanford University, and finally for the democrats who are swayed by style over substance she is an African American woman."

" What more can you ask for?" said Bernitt as he was peppered by questions about the endorsement. " Of course I realize that Condie isn't going to be elected this year" concluded Bernitt. " But, when John McCain picks her to be his running mate remember where you heard it first."

In other off the field Apple news, it has been announced that the team will hold open tryouts this coming Wednesday evening. Time and location of the tryouts will be available on the Apple blog Thursday morning.

How bout them Apples!


The Apples would like to see Condoleezza Rice become the 44th President of the United States

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Apples Push For Change In U.S. Constitution

Apples Go To Washington
Time For A Change

Saywhat.com
Nashville, TN

With the 2008 Presidential Campaign now in full swing, it has been learned that the Apples have flip flopped on their previous plans to endorse a candidate and instead have shifted their attentions to the process of electing a President.

When reached at his headquarters in Nashville, AGFHOF Don Bernitt confirmed today's reports while admitting that the task about to be undertaken by the Apples was monumental.

Bernitt also confirmed earlier reports that the Apples were within a few days of publicly announcing their endorsement of Barak Obama for President. " That's right" said Bernitt when asked if the Apples had made a preliminary decision to endorse Obama. Added Bernitt, "if the people of this land think that our country and government are that bad, and if the folks think that our country's War on Terror is a farce, then let's have sweeping changes and move on."

"The way I see it" continued Bernitt " the Democrats have had enough of the Bush's and the Republicans have had enough of the Clinton's. " I say it's time to live the words of JFK and pass the torch to a new generation of Americans"

Bernitt then launched into the point of his message when he announced the Apples are looking at grass roots efforts to change the U.S. Constitution by addressing the archaic system that is the Electoral College. "I would like to think that all Americans agree that the process in it's current state is broken" said Bernitt.

When pressed for specifics about his thoughts on the Electoral College, Bernitt answered the question with a challenge to all in attendance. " Get informed, get involved and then let's talk."

It has now become clear for all to see; opening day can not get here fast enough so that we can all get back to the important things in life i.e. playing ball and having fun.

How bout them Apples

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Apples Courted For Endorsement

Apples To Enter Political Race
Endorsements Expected

Votedotcom
Nashville, TN

With the Christmas and New Years holidays in the rear view mirror it is being reported that the Apples will begin 2008 by entering the political arena and for the first time endorse presidential candidates.

Reports have the Apples being courted by several Presidential candidates from both parties in an effort to reap the media bump that would follow any endorsement by the Apples.

When asked for comment on the reports of an Apple endorsement in this years elections, AGFHOF Don Bernitt said that he was not yet ready to publicly discuss specifics on the issue. Bernitt did point out that this years election could be historic. " It has to do your heart good that hopefully America is about to begin to put our past history of prejudice and racism behind us for good"

Bernitt pointed out that of the candidates likely to succeed W, we may elect either the first black, the first woman, the first gay or the first Mormon faithed candidate to be our President. " You can't hate everybody, so the time has come to get over all prejudices and let the best candidate win" said Bernitt as he snacked on Jellybeans at a black tie fundraiser sponsored by Condleeza Rice and Joe Liberman supporters.

When pressed for a timetable on when an Apple endorsement could be expected Bernitt said that an official announcement would come only after a pending off shore business deal in is finalized.

Bernitt then asked that all Americans consider not voting in this falls election so that his vote would carry more weight in determining the next President of the United States.

How bout them Apples.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Frozen Apples

Apples Join Polar Bear Club
2008 Training Begins

Burbaby.com
Nashville, TN

With the calender now reading 2008, the Apples began their off season training regime in style by joining the world renowned Polar Bear Club.

AGFHOF Don Bernitt and starting Apple Outfielder Patty Pender were joined by Pender's high powered agent Barbara Woehnker and team batboy Hayden Todd as they took on the wintry elements of New Years Day and went for a swim in Nashville's Percy Priest Lake as part of a worldwide Jan. 1 tradition know as the Polar Bear Club.

With gusting winds that had the wind chill factor at a freezing 15 degrees the Apples took the plunge as they dove into the almost as cold 36 degree waters of Percy Priest lake.

When asked to comment on the polar plunge taken by the Apples, Dan Bernitt the father of Don, who was in Nashville to celebrate the New Year said that after some forty plus years the time has finally come for DNA testing. "There's no way that stupid SOB shares my genes" said the elder Bernitt as he sat by the roaring bonfire and sipped hot chocolate with the other onlookers in attendance.

A new year is here and perhaps another Apple tradition has been started, so here is your invitation to join the Apples next Jan. 1st for the second annual Apple Polar Bear plunge.

Have a Great 2008 and how of course... How bout them Apples!!

See photos below or on page B1 of the Tennessean. Also visit 'tennessean.com' for video of the days events

http://www.tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/section?Category=VIDEO

The Apples hosted the first annual Apple Polar Bear Plunge on New Years Day

"That was pretty darn cold" said AGFHOF Don Bernitt after his dive into the 36 degree waters of Percy Priest Lake.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

GOD Bless America

Apples Pained
Realize Their Good Fortune

RealLife
Nashville TN

The Apples today join the rest of the world in expressing their deepest sadness upon hearing of the assassination of former Pakistan Prime Minister and opposition leader Benazir Bhutto.

"It feels like I've been kicked in the stomach " said Don Bernitt this morning. "It is a crying shame that we have to witness mans inhumanity to man like this." "What about peace on earth and goodwill to all" continued Bernitt

Bernitt went on to say that although he would not pretend to be able to tell anyone of the long history and struggles of the Pakistani people, he would however stand up in front of anyone and tell them that the assassination of Bhutto should be publicly condemned by all. To quote Mohandas Gandhi " Non-cooperation with evil is a sacred duty"

"As we in America enter into our political season and prepare to elect a new President, it is our duty to be individually aware that we are living in the greatest country on earth and we must all reject the violent avenues taken today in Pakistan." added Bernitt


Peace be with Benazir Bhutto and GOD bless America.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Merry Christmas from the Apples

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through Nashville
Not a creature was stirring, not even an Apple;

The stockings were hung on the bat rack with care,
In hopes that opening day soon would be there.

With Tony in his new red shoes and Brooke in her cap,
the Apples had settled down for their off season nap,

The Apples were nestled all snug in their beds,
while visions of another undefeated season danced in their heads.

When out on Granny White Field there arose a clatter,
I jumped from my sauna to see what was the matter.

Away to the dugout I flew like a flash,
tore open the gate and threw out the starting lineup.

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
but a dozen new balls and a case of Coors Light Beer.

Then there was a bald old Apple so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be Don Bernitt

More rapid than John Jones the team they came,
and he whistled and shouted and called them by name;
Now Keith, now Patty, now Robin and Gregs,
On Christi, On Tiffany, and Sarah and Shane

From the top of the batting order to the top of the standings,
now hit that ball,hit that ball, hit that ball all!

And then in a twinkling was heard on the dugout roof,
the prancing and pawing of Bella's little hoof.

As I spat in my hand, and was turning around,
down the dugout Commissioner Sammy Metz came with a bound.
He was dressed in Apple red from his head to his foot,
and his clothes were tarnished with seaweed and soot.

A bundle of new Apple uniforms he had flung on his back,
and he looked like a school boy just opening his pack.

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
soon gave me to know that the Apples are not dead.

He spoke not a word but instead went straight to work,
and filled all the bat bags before calling the umpire a jerk.

Laying a finger aside his nose, and giving a nod out the dugout he went.
I heard him exclaim as he rounded third and was soon out of sight,

"Merry Christmas from the Apples and to all a good night."


How bout them Apples !!

Saturday, December 15, 2007

A New Apple Arrives

Holiday Season Brings A Gift
Apples Celebrate A New Life

Girlsrule
Nashville, TN

It what undoubtedly is the greatest gift of all, the Apples today announced the newest member of the Apples with the birth of Paula Grace Alexander.

Gracie as she will be known is the daughter of 2007 Apple All - Star and League MVP Shane Alexander and his wife Angela. " It is by the grace of God that Angela and I have been blessed with our beautiful daughter " said the proud father as he left the hospital to take his most special gift of the year home for her first Christmas.

The entire Apple family extends their best wishes to Shane, Angela and Gracie.

How bout them Apples !!


Paula Grace Alexander studies her dads swing as he goes through off season batting practice

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Kaylor On The Move

Apples Active In Hot Stove League
Kaylor to Join Wisekal in Arizona

Sunnyside Up
Nashville TN

As was first reported yesterday, the Apples have officially announced that last years Team Apparel Manager Tim Kaylor has accepted a similar position at the teams former Spring Training Complex in Phoenix, Arizona.

" I'm excited as heck " Kaylor said when reached for comment last night at a Nashville Christmas tree lot. " This is always a joyful time of year for me and I feel especially grateful this year for the gift of this opportunity that has come my way." When asked what he would miss the most about Nashville as he heads to the Grand Canyon State, Kalyor said " The UT Vols and the GTC. "

Kaylor will be joining Exec. V.P. Chris Wisekal who's move to Arizona was announced on this blog this past Oct. Wisekal could not be reached for comment on Kaylor's pending move which is not uncommon for Wiskeal who tends to spend a good bit of his off season drinking wine and smoking cigars in the hot tub at his sprawling Middle Tennessee home.

Of course no off season news would be complete without a word or two from AGFHOF Don Bernitt who himself is in the middle of a hectic off season of training and restructuring. When approached at the Nashville Airport before departing on a flight for Moscow to meet with Vladimir Putin, Bernitt said " I'm happy for Tim, he has been a great friend of the Apples in Nashville and I will miss him." " However" added Bernitt " I've made several trips to the Valley of the Sun the past few years and now I have another reason to go"

And so the off season rolls on and the clock continues to tick, 93 days till opening day.

How bout them Apples

Kaylor (right) and Wisekal enjoyed cocktails after announcing Kaylor's move

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Apples To Hold Press Conference

Off Season Announcement Planned
Details Unknown At This Time


WhatsNext
Nashville

Sources close to the Apples are today reporting that a "major" off season announcement is pending and that an formal press conference is being planned for this week.

When contacted over the weekend for comment AGFHOF Don Bernitt denied reports that the Apples were about to announce their 2008 title sponsor. The Apples have been in high level discussions for several weeks as they work towards finalizing what is expected to be a long term naming rights deal with the team.

Bernitt, who had just finished meeting with team procurement officials responsible for the naming rights negotiations, refused to comment on the specific Apples news that is pending. "I can tell you this much " said Bernitt " this is not about our naming rights or our new stadium, it's simply news of a rooster move that will have a few folks being shuffled around." Bernitt then joined several other Apples as they watched video tapes of the recent World Hot Air Balloon Championships that were held in Phoenix, AZ. " I thought I'd take a look at Phoenix on video tape since the Titans SUCK and wont be going there for the Super Bowl " added Bernit

If recent Apple events are any indication of what is to come next then the one thing can be said for sure............ How bout them Apples!

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Apples on Monday Night Football

Apples A Mile High
Denver Welcomes the Apples

SkiColorado.com
Nashville,TN

Following a weekend at the United States Air Force Academy, the Apples continued their Colorado off season tour Monday with a surprise visit to Denver's Mile High Stadium. The Apples were special guest of The National Football League and ESPN as they joined in the pomp and circumstance that is Monday Night Football. When contacted at the NFL headquarters in New York, commissioner Roger Goodell pointed out that he and Granny White Coed Softball League commissioner Sam Metz were not just league commissioners but that they also were very close friends as well. " Sammy and I go back a long way and it's always fun when we can bring our two leagues together at some level " said Goodell.

Not to be lost in the evening was the fact that the Apples happened to be in Denver when Nashville's own Tennesse Titans came to town for the Monday Night Showdown. "Yes we knew about this game before we came west " said AGFHOF Don Bernitt as he buttoned down his winter parka as the Colorado evening turned chilly when darkness arrived.. " If you remember back the Titans were an opponent of ours during the softball season and we kicked their butts when we played them so we thought the least we could do was come out here and try and root them on to a win." added Bernitt as he filled his pint size thermos with a unknown liquid.

When asked for comment following the game Bernitt said " well the Titans sucked when we played them in softball this summer and it has to be pretty damn clear to anyone who watched the game tonight that they still SUCK!" Bernitt then joined the rest of the Apples as they waded into the crowd of jeering Broncos fans as the evening at Mile High Stadium came to the end.

With that it was quick police escort back to their hotel for a quick nap and an early morning flight back to the Music City. And so it goes, another road trip on the Apples off season tour is in the books and the only thing that can be said for sure is, How bout them Apples!

PHOTOS BELOW


The fans in Denver were giddy when the Apples were spotted in the crowd at the Broncos Monday Night Game


The Apples visited the Christi Copous wing of the Coors Brewery in Golden, CO before the Monday Night Game

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Apples Soar

Goodwill Tour Continues
Air Force Academy Welcomes Apples


Stars and Stripes
Nashville



The Apples off season goodwill tour continued this past weekend with a team visit to the United States Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs, CO. The Apples were special guest of the USAFA and Cadet 4th Class Michael Oliver.

" You can't believe what their visit has done for the morale here at the Academy " said Oliver during a break in the weekends activities. " It's a pretty tough go around here on a day to day basis and it was nice to see some familiar faces for a day " continued Oliver.

The Apples weekend at the Academy was highlighted by a team visit to the Air Force - San Diego State football game. As has become a custom with the Apples the team joined in the local activities of the day and were led by outfielder Patty Pender who piloted one of the F-16 Thunderbird fighter jets during their traditional fly over of Falcon Stadium before the start of the game.

" It was an awesome ride " said Pender as she stepped out of the cockpit of the jet following her flight in the shadows of the Rockie Mountains. " I wish they would have given me more fuel, I could have stayed up there all day "

When asked for his reaction to the pre game flight AGFHOF Don Bernitt said that although he enjoyed watching Pender scream across the sky with the Thunderbirds he was concerned that Pender might have violated her contract which strictly prohibits any activities that could put her or any Apple in a position that might lead to injury. " We'll have to check with our legal dept. before we take any action " said Bernitt

Following Saturday's events at the Academy the Apples took to the road for a visit to Pikes Peak and one of nature's true wonders, the 'Garden of the Gods' "It's an amazing place " said former Apple Head Coach Dennis Miller as he wiped tears from his eyes after being overcome by the splendor of the purple mountain majesty of the Rockie Mountains. Miller, who coached the Apples in 2005, and his high powered agent Barbara Woehnker flew into Denver over the weekend to join the Apples fueling rumors that Miller and his agent are in negotiations with the Apples that would lead to Miller rejoining the team for the 2008 season. When asked to comment on the possibility of Miller signing a new contract with the Apples, AGFHOF Don Bernitt said the chances were about the same as the Green Bay Packers chances going to the Super Bowl. " Stranger things have happened though " said Bernitt has he and his father Dan joined several other Apples on a hike up into the snow capped Rockie Mtns.

And so it was as the Apples off season tour continues and once again the question to be asked is, what next?

How bout them Apples !

SEE PHOTOS BELOW






Apple outfielder Patty Pender ( second from bottom ) piloted an F-16 Thunderbird during a flyover before the Air Force Football game

ESPN is reporting that Air Force freshman Michael Oliver will probably not win this years Heisman Trophy..


Oliver for Heisman in 2010 fan clubs are now forming in your area.

Website construction in progress.


The Apples celebrated Michael Olivers 18th birthday at the United States Air Force Academy
As with the Apples Coed Softball team, this rock formation at Garden of the Gods shows that life is a balancing act


At 2 miles above sea level the Apples were near the top of the world

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

APPLES on EBAY

Naming Rights Available
Bidding Underway

TIASBEM
Nashville,TN

Following last weeks news that the Apples have expired their naming rights contract with multi year sponsor FreshPoint and Overton, it has been announced that the bidding war for a partnership with the Apples is officially underway.

The naming rights and overall sponsorship of the Apples are now available world wide via the auction site EBAY.

To place your bid visit the live auction at www.ebay.com and enter item # 160173458836 in the search bar.

Good Luck and Bid High.


The Apples

Friday, October 26, 2007

Apples Move On
Team Sponsorship Ends

NextPage
Nashville,TN

In a written statement released by Granny White Coed Softball League Commissioner Sam Metz, it was today announced that Nashville Coed Softball giant 'The Apples' have after 16 years of successful partnership ended their affiliation with past team sponsors Overton and FreshPoint.

The announcement by Metz stated in part that " It is with gratitude, and in appreciation of all past and current colleagues that the Apples have elected to end their relationship with their current sponsor."

To many softball fans around the world this decision by the Apples may come as a surprise, but to those close to the Apples and familiar with the teams inner workings this move will be seen as one whose time has come.

When interviewed near his gated Hilton Head Island off season home, AGFHOF Don Bernitt thanked his sponsors for " A wonderful decade and a half of partnership and support." " Think about it " added the always humble Bernitt, " we started this team at basically ground zero 16 years ago and through the efforts of many built it into a local dynasty that can not be denied."

"Looking back we always did whatever it took and busted our butts everyday to get to this point" said Bernitt. "We have made it to the top of this mountain and now we are going to go climb another." Bernitt continued the interview by adding that " today, today, today, I consider myself the luckiest, luckiest man on the face of the earth, earth." "I would also like to publicly thank the Lord Jesus for all the wonderful experiences and relationships I have enjoyed these past years, I'm darn proud to be an Apple" said Bernitt as he sipped his Starbucks Non Fat No Whip Extra Hot Mocha near the Sea Pines Beach Club.


With the news of the Apples change of sponsorship, it brings to light the possibility of the team now resigning All Star First Baseman Christi Copous who last week left the Apples to test the free agent market. When asked if any contact had been made with Copous to discuss her desire to rejoin the 2008 Apples, Bernitt said that before any moves are made in that direction Copous would have to show that she could still hit.

With the 2008 season just a few months away the question to be answered now is who will step up and fork out the large amount of cash needed to assume the highly visible role of title sponsor of the Apples. When asked for comment, Bernitt acknowledged that the Apples have entered into a tentative contract agreement with a new sponsor but that the name and details of the partnership will remain confidential until new team colors and logo's are finalized.

When contacted at the Apples Marketing Department for possible insight on the team's new look, Head Apparel Buyer Tim Kaylor said that he has seen an increase in sales of Apple gear over the past few days. " I guess we are looking at vintage items now and without question they have been flying off the shelves." Kaylor refused to comment on the Apples new look when pressed for details and directed all further inquiries to the League Office.

Additional attempts to learn of the Apples new look were unsuccessful when team swing coach Jeff Bailey responded to questions with a stern statement of " Listen fella... I have a cruise line to catch in a few hours and right now I don't give a F*%% about your Bull*#%* questions."

If history is any indication of what is to become of the Apples, it is a safe bet to say that the 2008 campaign will be an explosive season and that we will all soon again hear that now famous cheer...............How bout them Apples !!


*** Additional insights and unedited comments by Bernitt are also now available on the Apples Premium Members Only pay for view website. For membership information leave your contact information below.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Apples Announce Front Office Move
Chris Wisekal Heading West

Golf Digest
Nashville, TN

Following last weeks off season news that Apple All Star First Baseman Christi Copous has elected to enter the free agent market and will not sign with the Apples, it has now been learned that longtime team Executive Vice President Chris Wisekal likewise will also be leaving the Apples.

Sources close to the Apples and speaking on the condition of anonymity, have told Golf Digest that although Wisekal will not be leaving FreshPoint he will in fact be leaving the Apples in Nashville.

Initial reports have Wisekal leaving the Apples to accept the challenge of heading up the teams new training facilities in Phoenix, AZ. When approached in a suburban Nashville drug store parking lot over the weekend, Wisekal quickly threw his newly purchased suntan lotion and sunglasses into his truck and departed without comment.

When contacted at a Smyrna,TN pizzeria Saturday night, AGFHOF Don Bernitt denied any knowledge of Wisekal's impending move and would only say that " I've played golf with Chris and there is no doubt that the courses in Nashville simply do not challenge his game anymore." " Chris is a player, if he takes his game west there is no question that he will love what Arizona has to offer."

Bernitt continued by saying that if this news of Wiskeal's departure is true that he and all the Apples " thank Wisekal for all he has done for the club over the many years of their shared tenure in Nashville. " Chris will be missed there is no doubt about it " concluded Bernitt before returning to feast at the newest Snappy Tomato Pizza Buffet to open in Middle TN.

And so it goes, the Apples off season rolls on and now the question must be asked, what other moves are to happen before we again hear that now famous cheer................ How bout them Apples !!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Apple Turnover
Copous To Leave Team

Bite Online
Nashville, TN

In breaking news out of Nashville, it has been announced that Apple All Star First Baseman Christi Copous has elected to opt out of the final year of her contract with FreshPoint and will instead enter the lucrative free agent market heading into the 2008 season.

Although attempts to reach Copous a 4 time All Star and the 2005 Granny White Female Player of the Year were unsuccessful, AGFHOF Don Bernitt was contacted at his sprawling Nashville estate for his reaction to Copous's departure from FreshPoint. Said Bernitt, " Graveyards are full of irreplaceable players and on top of that I've been wanting to play first base for a while so this is no skin off my back." " Although I wish Ms Copous well, I also look forward to beating her brains out if we go up against her next season" added Bernitt

Asked if Copous's leaving FreshPoint might lead to the first ever retiring of a number by the team, the hard of hearing Bernitt said " I don't think calling anyone retarded does any good and I wont get into a mud slinging contest over her leaving FreshPoint"

When then asked if he expected any other roster moves to take place before the Apples begin their 2008 chase for the Coed Softball World Championship, Bernitt said " Gosh I sure hope not, but I've been playing this game for a long time and nothing surprises me anymore."

With her departure from FreshPoint now official, Copous leaves behind a record of achievement that will be hard for anyone to match. So with that, there is but one more thing to say.. Best Wishes Christi and rememeber, once an Apple always an Apple.

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Apples Do The GTC
Training Takes Backseat To Fun


The 2007 FreshPoint Apples Summer Tour shifted gears this past weekend as the Apples throttled back from their recent hectic traveling schedule and took part in a rare hometown appearance in Nashville.

The Apples were the special guest of the Germantown Social Society at the glitzy event held Friday night at the exclusive Germantown Cafe. AKA - GTC. The Apples were joined by several other sports legends including Martina Navratilova and Billie Jean King as well as Apple front office personnel for the evening of good fun and good cheer to help kick off the the annual fundraising effort to support Coed Softball across America.

"It's a nice way to give back to the community and help raise some money at the same time " said Apple First Baseman Christi Copous as she and fellow Apple Patty Pender visited with guest who paid upwards of $2.35 per beer to attend the function. " It's a nice break from the off season training we've been doing the past few weeks" added Pender as she danced her way across the crowded room to visit with Apple administrator Patti Rowe who was in attendance with her longtime companion Bart 123.

"It's been a fun evening and I've met a lot of great people tonight" added Apple Press Secretary Rachel Goldstein as she and Team Procurement Officers Tim Kaylor and Donna Oldenbroek traded shots of tequila at the packed bar of the GTC. Other faces in the crowd included Team VP and General Manager Jeff Hall, former Apple Dennis Miller and AGFHOF Don Bernitt. "It's all about the next generation of Apples " said Bernitt as he discussed the fund raising events of the evening and bragged to anyone who would listen about his nephew Michael who this past week was awarded a spot on the Air Force Academy football team following his successful walk on tryout.

With their off the field fun now behind them the Apples will turn their attention back to the basics as they host their one and only open tryouts for new players this coming weekend. All players interested in trying out for the few open spots on the Apples roster are asked to submit a non refundable cashier check for $1,000.00 to Apple bean counter Dara Wynn ( who was also spotted at the GTC ) by Wednesday 22 August. All checks should be issued in the name of ' APPLES SOFTBALL or DON BERNITT '

And so it was as the Apples enjoyed another off season summer tour stop and brought good will to the home crowd. No telling what is next but what thing to be said for sure, How Bout Them Apples!



Don Bernitt shares a laugh with tennis legend Martina Navratilova at the Apple fundraiser held this past weekend at the GTC


Apple Patty Pender was photograped with Auto Giant Sue Krawczyk and tennis star Billie Jean King while at the GTC

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Apples Take A Hike
Appalachian Trail Provides Extreme Training

The 2007 FreshPoint Apples summer tour continued this weekend with a trip to the Blue Ridge Mountains and a back country training regime that challenged anyone who dared.

Led by Starting Outfielder Patty Pender, the Apples took part in a rigorous off season Appalachian Trail workout that would match even that of the United States Air Force Academy's basic training program.

Pender, who was named Defensive Player of the year following this past season, led the Apples as they took part in a variety of trail running, wood splitting and log carrying exercises along the famed Appalachian Trail.

" It's tough but enjoyable " said Pender during a break in the training. " It's nice to get a chance to do something different then the normal off season workouts we do back at the Apple Complex in Nashville " added Pender as she hydrated herself in the 100 plus degree temperatures that gripped the region.

" From what I can tell the Apples train harder then we do " said C4C Michael Oliver who last week completed his basic training as an incoming freshman at The United States Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs, CO. "I'm not surprised for a second that Aunt Patty kicked butt in the woods because she has been kicking my Uncle Don's butt for years " added Oliver as he prepared for his attempt to make the Air Force football team as a walk on. When asked about the possibility of him joining the Apples following his stint at the Air Force Academy, Oliver said " yea, my plans are to be the first former astronaut to play for the Apples and I look forward to joining them on the field in about 30 years." Oliver then politely dismissed himself to join his fellow Cadets in attending a previously scheduled practice as a new member of the Air Force Academy Chorale.

As the Apples push their way through the dog days of summer it must again be asked, what's the next stop on the Apples summer tour? Although that question remains a mystery there is of course one thing to be said for sure... How bout them Apples!


Outfielder Patty Pender led the Apples on a back country training regiment




Patty Pender said the mountain training was tough but enjoyable


The Apples carried logs along with a 50lb knapsack



The Apples exchanged their bats for sledge hammers during this off season training exercise
Cadet Michael Oliver trains at the Air Force Academy.



" I can do this with one leg tied behind my back "




Michael Oliver and his mother Gail are both big fans of the Apples
A Father's Pride

Michael's father Kris retired from the Air Force and is now negotiating a contract to become the official pilot of the FreshPoint Apples

Sunday, August 5, 2007

Apples Visit Penn State
Joe Paterno Headed To Apples ??

Blue and White Daily
Nashville, TN

The 2007 FreshPoint Apples summer tour continued this weekend as the Apples took their road show north of the Mason Dixon line for only the second time in team history. The Apples were special guest of the famed American Indian Princess 'Nittany the Lion' as they visited Central Pennsylvania and the campus of Penn State University.

Although initial reports had the Apples participating in various fund raising events in State College and around the Penn State campus, it is now being reported that the main purpose of the Apple visit was to meet with and negotiate a contract with legendary Penn State coach Joe Paterno.

When asked about the possibility of leaving Penn State after 42 years as head coach, Paterno reminded everyone that over the years he has turned down coaching offers from the New York Jets, New England Patriots, Pittsburgh Steelers and the Miami Hurricanes. "I've had plenty of great offers over the years and I must say that this offer from the Apples is truly amazing " said Paterno. " Just to have my name mentioned in the same breath as an organization with the winning tradition and class demonstrated by FreshPoint is humbling "

Following Paterno's impromptu press conference, media members following the Apples this summer approached AGFHOF Don Bernitt for his thoughts on Paterno joining the Apples. " Sure, he would make a good bat boy " said Bernitt. " The guy's 80 years old and runs like he's 65. We certainly could find a place for him on the team if he elects to join us next year"

After commenting on the possibility of Paterno joining the Apples, Bernitt quickly turned the attention of the media to what he called " The Big News " " As with any team we need to keep our eye on the future as well as the present " said Bernitt as he discussed the minor leagues and the play of several potential future Apples. " Particularly we are watching a young right handed pitcher out of Delaware right now" said Bernitt.

Bernitt of course was referring to Jeff Oliver from Middletown, DE who last week picked up the win as he pitched his team to the Delaware Little League State Championship. When reached by phone for comment on his possible future with the Apples, Oliver said " it's been a dream of mine for a long time to be an Apple, just the thought of playing with a Future Hall of Famer like my Uncle Don is awesome." When asked if his goal was to join the Apples as soon as next season Oliver stated that his plans were to first finish High School, College and then Medical School. " Get back to me in 15 years " said Oliver before hanging up to begin his regularly scheduled piano lesson.

With the Apple summer tour to Pennsylvania now in the books, the obvious question must be asked, where next? Although that question can't be answered right now one thing can be said for sure............How bout them Apples!

PHOTOS BELOW.........
Joe Paterno couldn't hide his excitement when the Apples rolled into State College, PA and visited Penn State University

JoePa was humbled by an offer extended by the Apples to join the club in 2008




The Apples visited Beaver Stadium on the campus of Penn State University




AGFHOF Don Bernitt said Joe Paterno seemed a little stiff during a morning jog around Penn State
Jeffery ' J - Man ' Oliver stayed late into the night signing autographs and giving interviews after pitching his team to the Delaware Little League State Championship